Balance Gourd

Standing doom only
Bedside manners deliver rude unwakenings
While talking on the toes 
Takes a feat to a fit
Contortions unwoven
Thread regularity by slight angular momentum
According to the perpendicular gravity 
Swished sidelong trances 
Proctor examish retests
Gramophone audibility grants permanence
As never-ending narrators say soft somethings
At a pitch whose curve matches the sonic frequentment
Of a squashed ear drumbeat 
Whose inner cochlear beam balances by the gourd