Shift Punt, Scales

Where will you slither next, my friend? The alley is no home for a python, even a medium-sized one like you. Don’t look at me like that, Scales. You know this is the right thing. Go back to the park. You don’t need to be eating trash-rats any more than you need to be eating feral cats. This is not your ecosystem. No, you won’t ever be going to your home-home. They’re not going to put you on a plane again. Yes, I know you miss it. Go back to the park and play with the squirrels. Oh, you want me to take you? Well you have to stay off my neck this time. The last time I picked you up, we had an understanding and you didn’t seem to understand after a while. All right, I’ll wait for you to digest the raccoon from this morning. You really shouldn’t have eaten that thing, those animals are gross. And it was still alive while it was going down for a while. You’re an animal, Scales.