Inside

When the air is heavy
With many things
I close the windows
And lay down
But not all the way down
Propped up
Sideways
On the couch
With just the right pillows
I eat
I contemplate nighttime coffee
I make food
I consider going outside
And choose not to go outside
Or drink coffee
But we'll see
What I decide
Because inside
Doesn't sustain itself
It is only inside
If outside
Is available
But inside's outside
The spaces unreachable
Unless I go out to them
Make me rethink
The coffee
And consider
Getting up
And up-side
Down
And pushing off the ground
Pulling myself up
Not by bootstraps
But by fighting gravity
Inside the house